Count to Ten
by Cynlee
Summary: Raph joins Leatherhead in Anger Management sessions with Audrey, little realizing just how important such lessons will become! Features my O.C. Mary Sue Audrey!
1. Chapter 1

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Okay, I know-- Where is "Ghosts"? That is what I'd like to know. I don't know what has happened. I have everyone prepared to fight, and yet I can't seem to get them to agree on a time and place. I'm still negotiating with them all. Perhaps after the shock of "Fast Forward" wears off I'll be able to get moving again. Until then, I am inflicting a story on you that is Raph, Audrey (my OC) and Leatherhead-centric. I hope it suits you all. Thanks to Rene for beta work!

The Turtles and Leatherhead are owned by Mirage. Audrey is owned by me. Sobek is owned by no one. Author Kellie Fay is writing a story that uses the Crocodile God Sobek as just that, while I am using the name "Sobek" as something that Audrey calls L.H. during training. We are both in agreement with this.

Anger is my worst enemy.

Audrey says anger can also be your friend.

"Once you understand and accept it, it can be your best buddy and staunchest ally-- but if you don't master it, it will master you."

"Whadda ya tryin' to do, sound like Splinter?"

"Sue me, Champ. But I know anger, just like I know depression."

Yeah, she had a point there; TWO points, actually.

Let me tell you an angry story.

"**Count to Ten"**

Don't tell Sensei, but I've been goin' to Audrey for "anger-management".

I didn't think he'd feel-- good-- knowin' that I was goin' to an outsider for somethin' he'd been tryin' to help me with all these years.

Don't get me wrong, Sensei is the best! I love and respect him somethin' fierce.

But I sometimes wondered if he really understood anger.

I've rarely seen him riled up. It's sorta cool watchin' him get all hot and ready to blow-- but he usually is calm and controls it.

I'd been pretty cool myself, for a while-- at least I hadn't gone after Mike the way I almost did the night I met Casey.

But lately, little things had been tickin' me off, like:

Mike.

Milk runnin' out.

Leo.

Trainin'.

Don.

Klunk.

The price of gas-- damn!

Mike.

The Foot (and KARAI!-- but Leo has dibs on that little feud).

Hun.

Mike.

Even Casey and April.

I dunno, maybe I'd reached some sorta teenage angst thing.

"No, you're just being you," Audrey said.

"You think I'm some kinda hothead and that's all?"

"No, you are just being you," she said, still unhelpful. "Raph, your temper is part of your character; it's a part of your temperament. It's not a bad thing, unless you let it control you. That's all I'm saying."

"I dunno, Aud, I don't like thinkin' that I'm just this angry guy, and that's all," I replied, getting angry-- and then calming down. After all, it wouldn't do for me to protest and then prove myself wrong at the same time.

"I didn't say that," she said, offering me more cookies-- fresh from the oven and smellin' better than anything has a right ta smell. Mmm... I just LOVE her oatmeal cookies.

"Quit looking at things in black and white, Champ," she continued. "You are Raphael, the one they call the 'hothead'-- it's part of your passionate nature. You feel things more deeply than others. Sure, you have anger," she laughed, taking a cookie for herself, "but it's not out of place unless you go after Mike with the intent to kill him."

I paused in mid-bite at that comment. She looked at me, noticing that I had stopped eating.

"What?"

I chewed, swallowed, and sheepishly looked at her.

"Uh, did you ever hear about how I close I came to doin' that?" And I told her. Bluntly. How I so lost it once that I came at Mikey with a pipe and almost-- almost--

She listened to me, shocked. Then, when it was over, she sighed, and patted my hand.

"Close only counts in horse shoes and hand grenades," she said with a small smile. "Has your anger ever hindered you in fighting your enemies?"

I thought hard about this. There's been so many times... so many fights-- both here and on other planets, at the Battle Nexus, hell even today, on the way over I cracked a few punks' skulls 'cause they was harrassin' some homeless dude-- not like the guy thanked me-- typical--

Then I remembered that Aud was waitin' on an answer.

"Well, I sorta ended up in solitary confinement on that Triceraton home world 'cuz I blew my temper at the head bastard prisoner," I finally managed.

"Yeah, but I'm not talking about that-- I'm talking about has it ever cost you a battle? Or a fight? Or the loss of a brother or a friend?"

Oh!

"Nope."

"Okay, then. I guess you can start the anger lessons with me and Sobek," she said, talkin' about Leatherhead. "Perhaps Casey would like to join us-- no, on second thought, he doesn't need it as much anymore, not since he and April hooked up. Okay, Champ. Be at Sobek's this Saturday and we'll start. Tell Splinter that you're coming over for extra training to help Sobek out."

"You mean, lie to Sensei?" I said, quickly grabbing more cookies.

"No, I don't mean lie to Sensei," she replied frowning. "You will be helping out Sobek. His temper is fierce, and he has less control than you due to that bastard Bishop!"

Her face got that look she got whenever that slimebucket's name came up. I could see the veins poppin' out on her neck, and I watched as her brow wrinkled up in really deep hate-frowns.

And then she counted to ten.

Several times.

Some of those times in Japanese.

It seemed to help; her face lost the flush of anger, and the wrinkles smoothed out, but only after the third or fourth time.

Then she continued.

"You will be helping out a great deal being there."

So I went home and mentioned it to Splinter, and he agreed readily.

I'm sure he knew the real reason, but he's so cool, he would never let on in front of the others.

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"I am Sobek, who dwelleth amid his terrors..."

I quote that line over and over to myself whenever I feel the anger rising-- like right now.

Sensei Audrey says that anger can be your friend, but you must control it, and not let it control you.

Easier said than done.

At the moment, she was counting to ten for the third time in a row, this time in Japanese.

Did you know that there are apparently three ways to do so in Japanese? I have learned much from Sensei's anger. She will count the "usual" way, and sometimes the "traditional" way-- and once in a great while, the "old style" way.

Michelangelo once called it "old school" and laughed, but he learned the hard way not to do so again where she could hear him. As I recall, he found out just how hard she can smack a tail or a head with that practice bamboo sword.

NOT that she's ever hurt me! It stings, but it doesn't hurt. But it does catch my attention.

I gazed longingly at my labratory. Donatello was coming over so we could work on a secret project, but today Sensei was in a mood about training, and I could feel the anger growing as the clock moved further and further past the usual finishing time of our lessons.

I think she forgot just who asked for these lessons! She did not own me, though she gave a pretty good impression of--

SMACK!

"OW!"

"Pay attention, Sobek! I'm not doing this for my health, you know!"

I rubbed the smarting place on my massive head and bowed. For being as short as she is, she certainly can find my head enough times.

Raphael stifled a laugh, and thereby missed his own turn with the bamboo sword.

"Now," she said, deliberately ignoring the entrance of my friend Donatello, "let us finish this lesson so we can all get on with our lives."

"No kidding," Raphael muttered, and this time she smacked him. "OW! Damn it, Audrey, I didn't come here ta be beat on by you-- OWOWOWOW!"

Donatello wisely headed into my lab, but I could hear his trail of snickers even over the protesting shouts of pain from Raphael.

As for my friend, he started to growl; his face grew red, almost matching the shade of his bandana. I could almost hear his teeth grind as he balled up his fists, his body tensing as if he was going to attack Sensei. I prepared to interfere.

And Audrey?

She stood there, a perfect target, one fist on her hip, the other lazily twirling the bamboo practice sword, eyes on Raphael and a thoughtful look on her face.

"Count to ten," she said, just as Raphael began to come up off the floor.

At her words, he froze! He actually froze and began to count!

"Ichi-- nee-- san-- shi--"

This was the first time since he began training with me that he got no further than almost off the floor.

The first time she had pushed him to his limit, he had jumped to his feet and was only three steps from her before she took him out with a wonderful sweep to his legs.

He had been embarrassed afterwards, and apologized profusely to her, himself surprised at how he had reacted. But she has merely patted his shoulder and told him it was all right, and then asked him if she had hurt him.

Just like Sensei!

She watched with satisfaction as Raphael counted to ten and then settled himself back into a sitting position, nodding her approval. Then she turned to me.

"You've made great progress," she finally said, as if this was the lesson for the day-- which, I guess it was. It certainly seemed to me to be a day where the three of us got angry at each other, but knowing Sensei, she was merely teaching the lesson.

Though she did seem to count a lot more than usual.

It didn't help that during the one sword kata from earlier, I kept forgetting a move and had repeatedly smacked her fingers a good one with the bokken. I'd never heard her swear like that before, but she immediately went into counting before the language got too colorful, and then managed to say "No, do it this way" without any anger in her voice.

And then it would happen again. I sensed that I would be practicing this lesson for a long time.

"Normally we would end this with meditation, but I see that Don is waiting for you, and I'm sure Casey is waiting for you, Champ," she said, turning to Raphael.

Then, purely for his brother's benefit (because the true reason Raph was here was a secret), she made a show of thanking him for his "invaluable help in Sobek's anger-management session."

Donatello made a choking sound from the lab. It was faint, but I heard it plainly.

Raphael mumbled some sort of farewell, then bolted out of my home.

Audrey turned to me, once he is gone, and asked the same question she always asked once we were through with the lessons.

"Did I hurt you today, my friend?"

And she was sincerely concerned. I recalled again her story of her beating at the hands of her father with such a weapon. She chose it, she said, as a reminder to not hurt anyone out of rage.

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"It's good for catching someone's attention," she had explained, "but it is also a constant reminder to me to never let my anger take hold of me, as it took hold of my father."

"I am fine, my friend," I responded, as I always do.

My head protested this statement; she had smacked me a good one today, but I was not telling her! I had a reputation to maintain, and it was a vain source of pride to me that I could take it better than Raphael.

Well, almost better!

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Finally! I thought this day would never end!

I was supposed to be teaching them to control their anger, and yet I was the one who ended up counting to ten the most today.

Sobek-- okay, now that the lesson was over, he prefered "Leatherhead"-- Leatherhead was completely distracted. Today was one of those days where he just wanted to be Mr. Scientist. He thought I didn't notice the number of times he kept checking that damn clock, counting the minutes until Donnie came over to play.

I decided that I'd start making a chart of it. I had to push him. Patience is a virtue, but mine was running out when he did stuff like that.

He had made great strides with controlling his temper. It'd been months since he'd snapped into an uncontrollable rage. My singing my special little song had become less and less necessary.

And his dealings with that son of a bitch Bishop-- _one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten_-- with Agent Bishop over that business when Don mutated into that GameraDon seemed to have helped as well where his self-control was concerned.

Leo told me that at first L.H. was quite stressed with being back in that lab, where all those unspeakable horrors and tortures he had been subjected to had taken place. That, coupled with the need to fight with Don while he was in that uncontrollabel monster stage, threatened to cause him to lose himself. But he was able to put it all aside with great determination and managed to find the needed cure, as well as the solution to Bishop's mutant monster problem.

Son of a fu--

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One, two, three...

I counted to ten many times as I made my way to their "new" home. Splinter and I were having dinner tonight. The guys still did not suspect anything about our relationship.

Just as well, I doubted I could have counted to ten enough times to have kept me from smacking Mikey a good one if he were to even HINT at anything...

__

"Hitotsu, futatsu, mittsu, yottsu, itsutsu," I decided to do it in the traditional way this time.

Bishop.

He was still out there, you know. His place in Arizona (there really WAS an Area 51, what do you know?) was totally destroyed, but he was still in business. Just lying low for the moment.

Bishop.

As if to ward off the jinx, I immediately looked around me. The way to their new home was very secure, but I did NOT want to risk leading anyone to it.

Paranoia.

_"Muttsu, nanatsu, yattsu_," I continued under my breath, feeling ridiculously nervous. "_Kokonotsu, toh! Hitotsu, futatsu, mittsu..."_

And I counted my way to my second home, and breathed a sigh of relief as I caught sight of Splinter, a welcoming smile on his face.


	2. Chapter 2

_I'm dusting off this oldie and trying a bit more of story._

_ Edit: 11/20/07-- some of you may have noticed that Ivorydrum has an awesome story called "Count to Ten". I did write my first chapter of this story last year. I hope there is no confusion between our stories. _

_TMNT, Leatherhead, and Bishop are the property of Mirage and 4Kids. Audrey is the property of me. And believe me, if I could find a way to make money off of her, I'd do so._

**Count to Ten-- Chapter Two**

I'm slowing down.

It's hard to accept, but I am.

Damn it, I do NOT feel that old, but lately I've noticed that, despite still teaching in my own dojo (though the nieces pretty much run it all any longer), despite daily working out, despite my sessions with Leatherhead and Raph-- I am slowing down.

I base this revelation on the fact that both of my students managed to tag me hard during today's lesson.

And it had not helped my mood when Raph pointed out how many times he had managed to break through my defenses.

_"Jeeze, Aud! Yer gettin' slow! You shoulda been able to block that attack--- OWOWOWOWOWOWOWCUTITOUTOWOWDAMNITOWOW!"_

Yes, I'm slowing down.

I should have been able to start smacking him on the tail before he'd gotten the word "slow" out of his wise-ass mouth.

"Ichi, ni, san, shi..."

I counted my way from Leatherhead's place to the lair, paranoia still evident.

It'd been several months, but I still kept an eye out for anyone--

-- actually, I kept an eye out for Bishop.

It's been awfully quiet lately in the City. Just the usual stuff-- Purple Dragons (damn, I've seen Hun on the news all dressed up-- he cleans up nicely, but still, what a crook!), the Foot (despite the fact that Karai still manages to perpetuate this aura of respectability, as well as the fact that she's still looking to destroy Leo), regular crime; you know, business as usual.

But down here, listening to the muffled sounds of the trains rumbling overhead, or underneath, or right next to whatever tunnel I happened to be in, I kept an ear out and an eye out for men in black uniforms.

I hate when I get in one of these moods. As I walked along, I felt myself making every effort to walk quietly. I strained to hear past every squeak of unseen rats, of the constant sound of running water, of the countless drip-drip-drips that occasionally rained down from above. But all I could hear were the usual sounds of underground.

I counted my way to Splinter's place, under my breath, angry at myself for being so paranoid.

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Man, Aud sure can hit hard when she's got her anger up!

Not that I can't handle it! I mean, I've taken the best that Shredder could deal out! Hun has landed a few good blows as well, and as for Bishop--

Anyways, like I was sayin', Aud sure can hit hard, but it ain't nothin' ta what Splinter has dealt out.

Heh. She sure didn't take that comment about slowin' down well.

I've been makin' progress with her help, though. I've managed to keep my cool with Mike lately. Splinter's been really pleased with me for doing so, and to tell the truth, I've been really pleased with me as well!

Of course, the extra benefit of driving Mikey crazy as he tries to figure out HOW to get a rise outta me has been pretty sweet.

_"Oh, Raaaaphie!" Mike sang out, sliding up to his brother with a winning smile on his lips and a surprise behind his back. "I got something for you!"_

_And he held out Raph's helmet, covered with Hello Kitty™ stickers._

_"I think it will look good on you!" he continued, the evil glint in his eyes even as his body got into its "run for your life Raph is after you" mode._

_Raph frowned._

_"You are gettin' predictable, ya know that?"_

_Mike, one foot about to lead the rest of his body away from the expected explosion, froze to the spot. His eyes were wide, but so far his mouth remained closed._

_"And 'sides," Raph continued, looking at the helmet, "I got a new one the other day. I gave that helmet to April. And you KNOW how SHE feels about Hello Kitty™."_

_NOW Mike's mouth fell open._

_Raph had wandered away, muttering something about "I don't wanna be around when she finds out about them stickers..."_

Ah, I love being topside!

The sound of the traffic, the heady scent of exhaust fumes mingling with the aroma of the local food carts, the blaring of so many radios pumpin' out so many different tunes, all competin' with each other ta see who can make the most impact; people talkin', arguin', singin' as they navigate the unbelievably crowded sidewalks (man, am I glad for once NOT ta be on the ground-- I'd go crazy in all that humanity! HOW can they stand bein' so close to each other?)-- I LOVE this City!

Casey and me got plans tonight. We heard that Hun's plannin' yet another of his amazingly successful raids against some shipment at the docks. I'm guessin' that it's more weapons stuff. Casey's source is a dockworker friend of his who won't say how he came by the info, but Casey trusts him, and that's good enough for me!

I just wonder, though-- when did Hun get so good? I mean, if this shipment is like the last few, then it's got somethin' ta do with Bishop's group. And I just can't figure out why Bish hasn't swatted ol' Hun upside the head yet. I mean, he's frickin' stealin' from the Government!

Hmmm... I wonder if Case'll get us a few of them hot-dogs? The smell is makin' me hungry!

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_I am Sobek, who dwelleth amid his terrors. I am Sobek, and I seize [my prey like a ravening beast. I am the great Fish which is in Kamui. I am the Lord to whom bowings and prostrations are made in Sekhem. And the Osiris Ani is the lord to whom bowings and prostrations are made in Sekhem._

I enjoy looking at this sign that Sensei made for me.

It has helped me, repeating especially that first line: _I am Sobek, who dwelleth amid his terrors._

Thanks to the help of Sensei Audrey, however, those terrors are not so prevalent.

And my temper is much improved.

Oh, I still have to watch out! I cannot take my growing control for granted. It sometimes does not take much to push me in the direction of my "old" self.

Michelangelo, however, has benefited the most from my control.

_"Hey, L.H.! Check out how I reorganized your lab!"_

_Leatherhead, entering his home with Donatello, felt something twitch in his jaw; Michelangelo had been in his lab?_

_Michelangelo had REORGANIZED his LAB?_

_"I tried to dissuade him," came the apologetic voice of Leatherhead's roommate Professor Honeycut. "But unfortunately, he was quite determined to do this-- eh-- 'good deed'."_

_"Mike, you'd better run," Don ordered, prepared to hold off his temperamental friend as long as he could. "You're gonna need a big head-start if you plan on reaching Splinter alive!"_

_"Gee, you guys are so encouraging!" Mike huffed, as he bravely (or foolishly) grabbed Leatherhead's powerful arm and started "dragging" him towards the lab. "I spent a perfectly good day for goofing off by cleaning, categorizing, and uncluttering this lab, and this is the thanks I get. C'mon! You just GOTTA see how I fixed it up for you!"_

_Don briefly considered phoning home for reinforcements. With any luck, Splinter could get there in time to at least help carry Mikey -- or whatever was left of Mikey-- home to safety._

_"See? What do you think? I put all the thingies in order on that shelf according to size, and those bits I organized by color, and the chemicals I didn't mess with, but I did wash out a bunch of your test tubes and beakers that seemed to have some glowing yellow fuzzy stuff growing in them-- you really shouldn't leave things on the burner while you're out, you could start a fire you know! And I also reorganized your file cabinet so that it's alphabetical now! That was a piece of work, let me tell you--- Hey! How come you're counting old school? Man, you've been hanging around Audrey too much! She was counting like that earlier today when she found out I'd cleaned and categorized and uncluttered her kitchen for her."_

_Leatherhead, in the middle his counting ("...yotsu, itsutsu, mutsu..."), took a slow, deep, deep, deep... DEEP... breath, held it, let it out, and then placed a large and potentially bone-crushing hand on the beaming Michelangelo's shoulder._

_"Thank you, my friend," he managed to sound grateful. "Thank you."_

Donatello was more than willing, once his brother had left "to make more people happy-- wait until what Casey is going to come home to!" to help me put the lab back to rights. Fortunately for me, Honeycut has an excellent memory, and it only took us a few hours to get approximately 75 of the items back to "normal".

Alas for my experiments on that mutating byproduct of Bishop's manufactured aliens... Donatello and I must now start at the beginning.

We want to be prepared. Neither of us can quite put our fingers on it, but this uncharacteristic quietness of Agent Bishop and his organization is disturbing. We both feel as if something is brewing; a storm of sorts that is gathering strength, waiting only for the correct atmospheric conditions to launch itself upon us with much destruction.

Sensei Audrey calls it "paranoia", yet I notice that she has been more "on guard" as it were, when we are strolling through the tunnels, or during our rare nighttime outings into Central Park for special training.

Bishop.

_Ichi, ni, san, shi..._

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"... and then he rearranged my kitchen," I concluded over my tea. Splinter nodded in sympathy.

"Yes... I have not figured out what he has done yet," he said, sipping his own tea. "He was very helpful in 'cleaning, categorizing, and uncluttering' the dojo. Leonardo is still in there, trying to correct it all."

From the dojo I could hear, faintly, Leo's voice: "...four-shi-yotsu... five-go-itsutsu... six-roku-mutsu... seven..."

Hmm... I'll have to try that method the next time. It might be more helpful in calming down. It certainly would take more concentration...

"The sensei becomes the student," I smile to myself, then turn back to Splinter. "Where is our helpful young turtle anyway?"

"He is out spreading more helpfulness," Splinter sighed. "I trust that Mr. Jones and April will be appreciative. I hope, at least, that they do not injure him."

"I wonder what he's up to? Or what he's done?" I frowned. For some reason, this behavior was rather disturbing to me. Then I forced myself to shake it off. It was just something "Mikey" and we'd all find out sooner or later what was going on.

We talked of other things, mindful that at least one son was in the lair, and careful to not give him any reason to suspect that there was more to our friendship than friendship.

But though we chatted about teaching and movies, and (joined by a frustrated Leo) the benefits of counting to ten in several languages, I felt this little nagging "something"...

I just wish I could figure out what it was.


End file.
